Guest post by Haydee Montemayor
Womanhood and motherhood are two powerful forces that unite women worldwide. However, while on the outside we often express a desire to help other women, on the inside, we often gauge our own self-worth by comparing ourselves with other women. When we become mothers, we often compare how our child rearing practices measure up to those of others. Why? Because our ego’s insecurities kick in. We forget that we’re all one.
Motherhood has been THE BEST thing that ever happened to me. Shortly after I knew I was carrying a baby in my womb, I felt the most purposeful I’d EVER felt. I knew I was co-creating something special with the Universe and that made me feel important, blessed, worthy and complete. While pregnant, I started connecting with mothers online to help me have a healthy pregnancy and prepare for 100% natural childbirth (which I’m super blessed that I was able to have). And then came the baby :) . I realized then, that I didn’t know everything no matter how much I had read and prepared myself and that I had to and wanted to continue learning and researching how to be a good mother.
All my life I have been a go-getter. But you know what I realized after becoming a mother? That the things we pursue in hopes of happiness prior to becoming a mother are pale in comparison to the satisfaction that being a mother brings.
I also noticed that I'm missing two words in a sentence. It should read like this, can you please change it?
Since the first day that I brought my baby home with me after his birth, I realized that he was the reason why I’ve always enjoyed Edwin McCain’s “I Could Not Ask For More” song lyrics, which say:
“These are the moments I thank God that I’m alive
These are the moments, I’ll remember all my life
I found all I’ve waited for
And I could not ask for more
Looking in your eyes
Seeing all I need
Everything you are is everything to me
These are the moments
I know heaven must exist
These are the moments I know all I need is this
I have all I’ve waited for
And I could not ask for more
[Chorus]
I could not ask for more than this time together
I could not ask for more than this time with you
Every prayer has been answered
Every dream I have’s come true
And right here in this moment is right where I’m meant to be
Here with you, here with me.”
Experiencing a deep love for someone and rejection by something in society, as painful as it seems is convenient, because it gives one the perspective one needs. I've experienced first hand, multiple times in multiple settings, the pain, betrayal, guilt and life-sucking existence that comes from being a round peg in a square hole. And I was tired of it.
Once I experienced my rejection, I devoured books, joined challenges, participated in webinars, started a meditation practice, listened to TedTalks and prepared myself to for once, go after my dream and actually convert it into a reality. All this time, I had been waiting for permission to do what I wanted, which was writing. And when I realized that I LITERALLY had nothing else to lose if I wrote, I took this leap of faith.
I'm still amazed how society expects us to give the very best of ourselves, when we're really not allowed to truly be ourselves. There's some sort of disconnect. Don't you think? Of course we all want to improve, but it's hard to be motivated to improve on something that goes against your very nature and your very reason for being. Mothering, thank goodness is natural. Loving is natural. Both of these things are beautiful.
So now, aside from being my baby’s primary caregiver first and foremost, I'm a blogger who aims to uplift people by helping them focus on the what they have to work with, personally and in general. I identify with mom bloggers and women entrepreneurs and mothers the most, but I also have plenty of men who follow me. I suppose it's because we can all relate to wanting to enjoy the present more and for wanting to appreciate ourselves perhaps for the first time ever. As moms, our calling to birth and care for a baby is a great treasure. And that is in part, why I named my blog www.loveandtreasure.com. The slogan on my site is "Cherish whom at what you have, fully appreciate what you receive, and expand the radiance you can give."
My blog posts are a brief reminder that not only should we see life as a glass half full, instead of half empty, but we should see ourselves as fuller than we realize, wiser than we realize, more abundant than we realize, because no matter what is going on in our life, we are always blessed and experiencing exactly what it is that we need to be experiencing for us to radiate all of our essence into the world. As long as we can feel present and worthy, we can have the energy to propel our lives and our families forward.
Haydee Montemayor’s Bio
Haydee Montemayor lives with her husband, son and dog in the United States. Even though Haydee has been cautious to put any label on her other than mother, if you had to define her, you could say that she is a:
- spiritual being, who likes to dream but who, similarly, has a healthy dose of realism that allows her to keep her feet on the ground,
- someone who doesn’t like rigid conventions
- a modern day soulful philosopher who is enamored by the “why” and the mechanics of life– especially when it comes to the deep and mystical things in life
- a mortal and a spirit who always tries to squeeze the most out of everything in life… even those occasional lemons that life hands you. =)
- a being who is part of the next- generation of spiritual thinkers who is here to embrace life fully and invite others to do the same.
- a writer
- an Oprah Winfrey, Dr. Wayne Dyer and Caroline Myss student and follower
- and most importantly, a loving mother
Haydee’s Commitments to You
“I am committed to inspiring you to love and treasure your family, your nourishment, your love relationships, your friends, your home, your belongings, your body, your mind and your spirit. As a matter of fact, that is why the slogan for the blog is, “Cherish whom at what you have, fully appreciate what you receive, and expand the radiance you can give.” I believe that NOTHING in life will matter— no accomplishment, no salary, no achievement, if you don’t first develop a sense of gratitude for what you already have. And as you’ll learn, if you haven’t already, you already have A LOT of positive things going for you, whether you can see them clearly right now or not. No matter what your financial life looks like, we are richer than the vast majority of the world. Even simple things that we often take for granted like electricity and plumbing make us so. But we have to be present enough to see these things in order to be of any value to the world.”
So I got an email with the "challenge" to write a post for Mother's Day, about what I have learnt from my mom. I have and why wait till mother's day, all of the following is how I feel most of the year.
Ok so this could be the longest list in the world, most of what I know came from her, spiced with the adventures of adult life, but the foundation was created in childhood, from her.
