Everyday life

Connect in Thursday: Look up and around

Look up - the self-compassion On this fine Thursday I would like you to look up. We can get so focused on where we are going, what we need to get done, that we miss little moments of beauty right in the middle of the familiar and ordinary. Curiosity is such a catalyst for adventure and that muscle may need some exercise, flexing and stretching. A simple practice like this can be a good way to start.

Today's practice: Look up and around you right now. What beauty is there to enjoy, take in, appreciate, where you are?

Beginning to open up with curiosity, with presence where you are, to experience in a more intimate way is more simple than you may think. Even if looking up takes you to the grey ceiling in the office. What you do you notice?

Share it with your friends.

[Tweet "Look up and around you right now. What beauty is there to enjoy, take in, appreciate, where you are? #connectinthursday @carinalyall"]

Thursday is connect in day on the blog. I offer a short, free practice or reflection to support you to connect to yourself and others with more presence, self-compassion and care. This is a little nugget of inspiration for you. Allow it move through you, and be open to what it may bring. Stay tuned here on the blog every Thursday.

xo Carina

Episode #5 Inspirational Woman Bri Seeley

Inspirational Woman Project Bri Seeley is here with a strong message and an inspirational project that is going to touch the hearts of many women.

She is an entrepreneur for all things woman that is passionate about sharing her story, and the stories of other amazing women. Her training and passion as a fashion designer led her to create a fashion label dedicated to femininity and helping women connect with their true selves.

Bri has paved her path by surrounding herself with inspirational women, which revealed to her a disheartening trend that she is dedicated to change. She recognized how intensely women search outside of themselves for happiness and validation, losing touch with what makes them women and conforming to external pressures of how women should show up in the world.

This gap between how women define themselves and how society defines them has created an immense amount of discord and unhappiness. Thus the Inspirational Woman Project was born. 

In this podcast Bri and I talk about

The self-compassionate woman podcast her upcoming book and the journey that brought her to creating it

The self-compassionate woman podcast why women don't feel like an inspiration

The self-compassionate woman podcast how digging deeper into the theme of womanhood has changed her, and those who participated, life

The self-compassionate woman podcast why this is (still) an important topic to explore

Check out more about the project here and connect with Bri on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram

a tribute to LOVE

9 years ago I met the man, it would turn out, who changed me. Tuesday is photo day on the blog showing glimpses of me life, practice and journey. Today is a tribute to the man, the love and the life I have shared with my blonde Scandinavian (who I first thought must be boring - how wrong I was). <3

#1 Before the kids. We look so well rested.

Love life and partnership

#2 Now expecting child #1. I am sure I said something REALLY funny. Still look very well rested.

9 years together.

#3 Ok now way past birth of first child and SO hard to find a picture we're both in . Such a bad photo, but HA! at least the wee one looks pretty fly! The second child is on the way.

roadtrip

#4 Things like this now dominate our camera...

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#5 and this my phone...

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#6 But once in a while we still get time to get away and enjoy each other's company.

Parents weekend out

#7 And here's to the next 9 years my love <3 (not knowing why it looks like you have fangs...)

to the next 6 years.

 

Episode #4 earthing with Olga Dossa

  olga3

Olga is a yogini, mama and the founder of Peaceful Mothering with Olga Dossa. She is committed to supporting mothers to step into their radiance by loving themselves first and claiming their desires.

Through her journey with postnatal depression, she learned that she couldn’t give her best from an empty cup. She left her high paying corporate career to pursue a life that would bring her peace and inspire her daughter to live her own greatest life.

Her great love for her daughter took her on the path of yoga, ayurveda and self-love. Olga believes that when mothers love themselves first, their children will thrive.

In this episode we talk about

The self-compassionate woman podcast how to stay grounded

The self-compassionate woman podcast why taking of yourself, as well as you family, is important

The self-compassionate woman podcast how we pass our way of living on to our children

The self-compassionate woman podcast working yourself too hard and Olga's personal story about working through postpartum depression

Interested in learning more about Olga? You can find her on her website, on Facebook, Instagram, Pintrest and Twitter.

Make sure to pick up your free bedtime relaxation to help you release the tension of the day and give you more radiance and vitality.

Podcast Episode #3 with Eyenie Schultz

eyenie The beautiful Eyenie Schultz guests with us today and shares her fun spirit and insights on breaking free from the grey Poncho… (yes me I had mine on the first time I met her…) and shining bright.

Eyenie is a SoulStyle Coach and Visibility Facilitator who helps women upgrade their styles so that the WOW they are on the inside finally matches what they wear and how they feel on the outside. 

She’s a “make others feel WOW” junkie, spirit expander, appearance enhancer and style revamper/curator.

Eyenie’s mission is to help you Live YOUR Technicolor Priestess by aligning your inner and outer beauty to create synergy, and enhance all areas of your life. She is a firm believer in focusing on all the magic and electricity inside and around you so that it may EXPAND in your life.

She joined us for a talk about

The self-compassionate woman podcast

 Freedom and self-expression and how we can hide behind clothes

The self-compassionate woman podcastHow to tackle a frumpin' closet and why you don't need a huge budget to shine

The self-compassionate woman podcastWhy it can be hard to allow ourselves to me seen and why clothes is so much more that just being vain

You are going to LOOOVE her. Also check out her free 10 day challenge here... 

 

Podcast Episode #2 with Julie Genovese

Julie Genovese

bio-image Julie Genovese This podcast goes to show that the online world hooks you up with amazing people that might have passed you by. I am a true fan of Julie's, and I am so happy she joined us.

Julie Bond Genovese is an inspirational speaker, coach, artist, mom and best-selling author of her award-winning memoir, Nothing Short of Joy, endorsed by Wayne Dyer, Dr. Christiane Northrup & Dr. Bernie Siegel. Being born a dwarf, with degenerative arthritis, was not the poison Julie originally believed - it was the cure.

She's been featured on TV & radio including Anderson Cooper Live, NBC LX, The Aware Show & Oprah.com. Julie mentors spiritual seekers and earthy-crunchy-creatives to transform life’s grief, let the soul lead, and woo our hearts back toward the Light. 

Julie came on the show and shared her wisdom and awesome laugh. This is what we talked about:

The self-compassionate woman podcast

Julie's amazing story and why she chose joy for herself

The self-compassionate woman podcast

 The art of breathing deeply

The self-compassionate woman podcast

The challenges that can leave on in the darker parts of life and what you can get from shifting perspective

You can check out Julie's free ebook "Release the Blocks So Creativity Rocks!" at http://www.nothingshortofjoy.com

On my nightstand... it's overloaded

When people post lists or pictures of the books they love or are reading at the moment, I always feel inspired... my fingers type in the url for my favorite online book store and really it all happens so fast, my brain doesn't really understand the chain of events until the confirmation email lands in my inbox. I love books. I see my partner's eyes glaze over every time another brown parcel is stuffed into the mailbox, "Do  you really read all of them, I never see you finish one"... he dares to share. Really I feel he shouldn't have any say, as he might be the last person on the planet who still buys 20 cd's a month.

Anyway, here is what I have my nose buried in right now. Of course due to work I buy a lot of book about meditation, inner work, women and story work. But at times it just becomes too much and I have to mix it up and read other kinds of literature.

So as inspiration, and clearly I don't only have 1 book going at once, this is what's on my nightstand at the moment...

Books I love...I placed Karl right in the middle, as I am sure he would appreciate it that company...

Episode #1 - With Jess Grippo

 

jessgrippophoto

 The new Podcast is off to a great start, starring the Beautiful Jess Grippo

Jess Grippo is a dancer, writer, inspirational speaker, and life coach. Her work is about inspiring people to dance through life: to become more self-expressed, to find peace with their bodies, and to get out of their own way when it comes to making creative dreams happen.

Having left her dancing and creativity aside for far too long, Jess finally discovered true self-expression and creative fulfillment through making her own dance videos. She now actively creates dance work and integrates this experience into her practice as a life coach. She offers inspirational dance classes, coaching programs, and her weekly blog, Creative Fridays.

She was a recently featured TEDx speaker in her talk, “The Dance Less Travelled.”

Jess is a very inspiring woman here are a few things we covered in this podcast

The self-compassionate woman podcast self-expression and why it can be challenging to do so

The self-compassionate woman podcast Jess' story and how she came to dance and expressing herself through dance and creativity

The self-compassionate woman podcast how creativity and self-expression can bring us together, rather than be a selfish act

The self-compassionate woman podcast Jess shares an exercise that she uses with clients and gets our groove on... you don't want to miss it

If you are interested in more info on Jess' work or taking her free 7 day challenge you can find her here...

Sleeping Beauty, the caffeine addict...

In the past year sleep has been a luxury and not a given, as our youngest apparently feels that sleep is overrated. I have inhaled coffee as the only way to keep me standing upright. During this time I have been more stressed and moody. And I haven't been getting as much out into the world as I wanted to. By habit doing nothing didn't seem like the best cure for the above. Thursday my partner told me to go away for 3 days, sleep, relax and do what I felt was most called for - wow, uhmmmm are you sure, really, ok see you Sunday. I am lucky in the man department I must say.

Out the door I went and took the train to my sisters. Of course I took some work with me thinking this time away would be productive... HA!

I am tired.

At my sisters I had a cup of coffee and didn't really like the brew she was cooking up, so I drank some tea instead. I left the coffee for the next 3 days. This being the first break from the black liquid in over a year. Friday morning I was so tired all I could do was lay on the couch - I stayed there until Saturday midday only to return a few hours later.

I couldn't believe how tired I was and being honest with myself I knew I had been for a really long time. Work, kids, life, habit got to me and I didn't really "hear" the need for more sleep.

Sleeoing beauty the caffeine addict

I normally listen to my body and respect my limits. I also know that I love cuddling up in the evenings a little late, I don't like sleeping during the day and I have so many ideas and love my work that it is hard for me to leave it be.

I am however even more aware that to keep it all up I need to respect my bodies limits and not drown it in caffeine. In the end it wasn't offering a positive contribution to my life.

And as I dive into the material for the upcoming HEAR*SEE*HOLD course I deepen that listening. As with most areas of self and life there is always more to be discovered. The coffee overpowered what my body needed, and in my case boy did I need to sleep, relaxation and to do absolutely nothing.

I came back with a few lessons learned:

1. I don't like filtered coffee

2. Sleeping on a couch for 24 hours ain't too good on the back

3. That I too have blind spots

4. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away

5. zzzzz zzzzz zzzzz

Put on your Red Shoes...

Ruth St Denis in a Burmese solo dance.

Something I have always admired is when people have the ability to play, let lose, dance crazy just because, kind of like Phoebe from friends and the episode where her and Rachel go for a run and Phoebe runs crazy, just because it makes it more fun (have you ever watched that episode?).

Anyway the more I play, dance around, laugh, giggle, fool around with my kids the better I feel. I also know that in stressful times I do less of the fun stuff and it makes me feel stuck and down.

In our house we all love to dance around. Not because we are that great at it, but we just have fun doing it. I love dancing and the music and the smiles that come with it. Everywhere around the World dance and music are a part of culture.

How about making this the week of shaking it?

I would like to focus on DANCE. I want you to turn up the Radio or put on your favorite tune and dance. Invite your kids to join you or do it on your own. Move your body, smile, feel foolish, free and dance. For sure for some it will feel weird or uncomfortable but see if you can push yourself a little with this one.

And for inspiration I would encourage you to watch this little video. I love this dude…

If dancing isn't for you, is there another activity that you feel is fun that you would like to commit to, and that does have a focussed outcome?

With love

Carina

The perfect, imperfect poem

imperfect

Maybe we just misunderstand what it says - I'm-perfect... :)

All I want to do today is share a poem about the icky and sticky subject of imperfection.  It is such a lovely poem and I feel it resonating with  A LOT in my life. Do you?

 

IMPERFECTION

I am falling in love with my imperfections The way I never get the sink really clean, forget to check my oil, lose my car in parking lots, miss appointments I have written down, am just a little late.

I am learning to love the small bumps on my face the big bump of my nose, my hairless scalp, chipped nail polish, toes that overlap.

Learning to love the open-ended  mystery of not knowing why

I am learning to fail to make lists, use my time wisely, read the books I should.

Instead I practice inconsistency, irrationality, forgetfulness.

Probably I should hang my clothes neatly in the closet all the shirts together, then the pants, send Christmas cards, or better yet a letter telling of my perfect family.

But I’d rather waste time listening to the rain, or lying underneath my cat learning to purr.

I used to fill every moment with something I could cross off later.

Perfect was the laundry done and folded all my papers graded the whole truth and nothing but

Now the empty mind is what I seek the formless shape the strange  off center sometimes fictional me.

Elizabeth Carlson

What do you love...

 about you...?

So how did it go with checking in last week? If you didn't read last week's post you can find it here..

Rick Hanson wrote the book “Hard Wiring Happiness” . In it he talks about letting short glimpses of happiness expand. Allowing yourself to begin to see happiness instead of all that is going wrong in you life. He also describes how this change in focus and wayof living, changes the circuit in your brain - very interesting!

I believe that this can be linked to self-compassion. You can feel love and compassion, maybe briefly, and then find a million reasons why that isn’t true or why you don’t deserve it, or how you aren't the person you want to be. This is simplified of course, but today I want to shine a light on focus, and a little shift on how you focus on you.

As moms we want to do our best. We feel and have great responsibility and love for our children. This can also bring on the judgment and guilt and sense of 'when will I ever be good enough'? To be in that place is very stressful.

A lot of wise people have said where your focus goes, your energy flows. As I feel Rick is pointing to.

This week I would like you to focus on the thing you are grateful for and/or like about yourself.

Write In Journal

Monday practice

I want you to get our your journal and write 3 things down that you like/love/appreciate about yourself. No one has to read it or agree with it- this is for you.

For some it might take time and feel a little uncomfortable, give yourself the space to reflect and sense into the question and start out where you feel true to yourself. For others maybe all the things you dislike come up first. Allow that to come up and pass. Continue to sit with the question. And eyebrows and fingers count as answers just fine (they were the 2 first on my list when I did this a few years ago…).

Do this every night this week and also reflect on how it feels to write it down?

If you feel called to, please share any thoughts in the comments below.

IMPORTANTO: Before I go I would like to remind you to take these exercises as they feel right. You alone know when it is too much, too little or when you need extra support. Be sensitive towards yourself.

What is Self-compassion?

Great question!

Baby Self Love

Some days I feels very unclear and I am judging myself a lot. Other days it feels very clear, and I do not beat myself up.

I believe in exploring, rather than giving answers (to some questions anyway) and I want you to feel into what self-compassion means and feels to you.

When you read the word self-compassion what comes up for you?

But, because it can be helpful to have an wise woman's word I would like to offer Kristin Neff’s thoughts on Self-Compassion. I am truly inspired by her and her work and can highly recommend her book. 

She writes that self-compassion consists of 3 elements: Self-Kindness, Common Humanity and Mindfulness. I feel they interweave, but that the first step is awareness. This brings us to know, and to the only moment we can move forward from.

Practice for this coming week

First step is really to become aware. Checking in and getting intimate with what is. An inner weather report if you will. So I'd like to introduce the short check-in.

Whenever you sit in the car, leave the house, go to the restroom or remember, do the following:

  • Close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths
  • Connect to whatever is going on right now, thoughts, kids screaming, lists and to do’s etc. As best you can without judging or hurrying to change it, just noticing.
  • Sense the body, feet, buttocks, back, hands, head
  • Not changing anything just noticing.
  • When you feel ready open your eyes and continue your day

Do this as many times a day as you feel called to. What do you notice when you check in? Write a few words down in your journal or share in the comments below.

With love

Carina

Mondays...

I just sold my company Mindful Ground. This means I can dedicate my full energy to the work that means so much to me - supporting mothers and being a mom. This also means a more consistent presence here on the blog - I am so excited. I have decided to dedicate Mondays to reflections and practices. Each Monday I will be sharing one or the other on the blog. For me it sets the stage for the week to come and even if I only ever touch on the theme that Monday it still has an flows through me throughout my day and sometimes the entire week.

Freedom - mother love

I tend to get lost in all the offers of amazing courses out there. I sign up only to (once again) realize that I am not superwoman, I do not have 10 days a week, I do not have 8 arms or that much energy past 9pm (really it is probably more like 7pm... but who's checking). I am a mom of two kids and that means less time to me and at times also a shorter attention span.

Knowing that and respecting it, all reflections and practices offered here will be short, sweet and doable.

Having studied and worked with meditation for years, I found that after I became a mom the intense and longer practices wouldn't fit into my life to the same extent. For some they feel that the quality of their practice is poorer. This isn't necessarily true. In the work I do I want there to be that understanding - what ever offered it has to be able to integrate into life with kids. All of this to unfold more and more over the coming weeks and months.

During the week I will blog when inspired, but I hope you check in on Mondays, the next many posts are ready to be shared.

A short reflection... 

How could you take a little time to yourself this coming week? It doesn't have to be a lot. A 10 min. break, a walk, a cup of tea, a few yoga poses, closing your eyes and feeling the air against your skin. How does it feel to consciously choose to prioritize YOU?

(Don't beat yourself up if you don't create space this week, allow this reflection or practice to unfold when the time is right).

See you next Monday

With love Carina

I'm out...

  So it's my 4 year birthday around this time,  I have been "in business" for 4 years. A lot of soul searching, mistake making and even more confusion has gone through the system.

When  I started out I liked creating, loved it actually. Writing, messing around with pictures and colors and getting it right... for me, reading comments and interacting with those who dropped by.

However, ever since I started out as a self-employed woman I have resisted it on some level. I love being my own boss. I love that I can go to work only wearing socks if I wanted to. But as with any uncommon ground (motherhood, new relationship etc) a little uncertainty sets in, and I at least have felt the need to follow the leaders.

I have joined close to every bizz style course you can - that's what you do eh?  It made me feel like I was doing it right, it would be horrible if I was viewed as unprofessional. So I nudged off track a wee bit. I have failed at pretty much every step I have been told to do. All the systems, because it WOULD make me grow - huh. Well it didn't.

Next thing I know I am tweaking my USP (Unique Selling Position) thinking this is pretty boring and not at all getting my heart in it. Then changing all my profile pictures so they were the same - no one likes a slob. Then creating profiles left right and center on social media sites. Next I am choosing a niche. Then I am driving myself to write "awesome" how to blog posts that always sort came out with the same vibe - the "I don't know, what do you feel?" vibe.

Then a business adviser who's last name was Focking (I kid you not) told me stop writing articles and posts in English and focus on the Danish crowd because that's where I live. And I can (and I think I will in posts to come) go on ...

I am fed up, I needed to go back and start again, with a little more knowledge and a lot more money down the drain.

So here's my new site, that has NONE of the above. And I am totally fine with it. I am back to creating, writing, going with the flow of what sits right with me and you reading. With a big happy birthday to the business

I hope you will join me here, the journey and the small acts of creativity, storytelling and honesty.

<3 Carina

If You Want to Be a Light for Your Family, Truly Evaluate Your Personal Presence

Guest post by Haydee Montemayor

Womanhood and motherhood are two powerful forces that unite women worldwide. However, while on the outside we often express a desire to help other women, on the inside, we often gauge our own self-worth by comparing ourselves with other women. When we become mothers, we often compare how our child rearing practices measure up to those of others. Why? Because our ego’s insecurities kick in. We forget that we’re all one.

Mother and Child Reunion

Motherhood has been THE BEST thing that ever happened to me. Shortly after I knew I was carrying a baby in my womb, I felt the most purposeful I’d EVER felt. I knew I was co-creating something special with the Universe and that made me feel important, blessed, worthy and complete. While pregnant, I started connecting with mothers online to help me have a healthy pregnancy and prepare for 100% natural childbirth (which I’m super blessed that I was able to have). And then came the baby :) . I realized then, that I didn’t know everything no matter how much I had read and prepared myself and that I had to and wanted to continue learning and researching how to be a good mother.

All my life I have been a go-getter. But you know what I realized after becoming a mother? That the things we pursue in hopes of happiness prior to becoming a mother are pale in comparison to the satisfaction that being a mother brings.

I also noticed that I'm missing two words in a sentence. It should read like this, can you please change it?
Since the first day that I brought my baby home with me after his birth, I realized that he was the reason why I’ve always enjoyed Edwin McCain’s “I Could Not Ask For More” song lyrics, which say:

“These are the moments I thank God that I’m alive

These are the moments, I’ll remember all my life

I found all I’ve waited for

And I could not ask for more

Looking in your eyes

Seeing all I need

Everything you are is everything to me

These are the moments

I know heaven must exist

These are the moments I know all I need is this

I have all I’ve waited for

And I could not ask for more

 

[Chorus]

I could not ask for more than this time together

I could not ask for more than this time with you

Every prayer has been answered

Every dream I have’s come true

And right here in this moment is right where I’m meant to be

Here with you, here with me.”

Experiencing a deep love for someone and rejection by something in society, as painful as it seems is convenient, because it gives one the perspective one needs. I've experienced first hand, multiple times in multiple settings, the pain, betrayal, guilt and life-sucking existence that comes from being a round peg in a square hole. And I was tired of it.

Once I experienced my rejection, I devoured books, joined challenges, participated in webinars, started a meditation practice, listened to TedTalks and prepared myself to for once, go after my dream and actually convert it into a reality. All this time, I had been waiting for permission to do what I wanted, which was writing. And when I realized that I LITERALLY had nothing else to lose if I wrote, I took this leap of faith.

I'm still amazed how society expects us to give the very best of ourselves, when we're really not allowed to truly be ourselves. There's some sort of disconnect. Don't you think? Of course we all want to improve, but it's hard to be motivated to improve on something that goes against your very nature and your very reason for being. Mothering, thank goodness is natural. Loving is natural. Both of these things are beautiful.

 

So now, aside from being my baby’s primary caregiver first and foremost, I'm a blogger who aims to uplift people by helping them focus on the what they have to work with, personally and in general. I identify with mom bloggers and women entrepreneurs and mothers the most, but I also have plenty of men who follow me. I suppose it's because we can all relate to wanting to enjoy the present more and for wanting to appreciate ourselves perhaps for the first time ever. As moms, our calling to birth and care for a baby is a great treasure. And that is in part, why I named my blog www.loveandtreasure.com. The slogan on my site is "Cherish whom at what you have, fully appreciate what you receive, and expand the radiance you can give."

My blog posts are a brief reminder that not only should we see life as a glass half full, instead of half empty, but we should see ourselves as fuller than we realize, wiser than we realize, more abundant than we realize, because no matter what is going on in our life, we are always blessed and experiencing exactly what it is that we need to be experiencing for us to radiate all of our essence into the world. As long as we can feel present and worthy, we can have the energy to propel our lives and our families forward.

 

Haydee Montemayor’s Bio

Haydee_MontemayorHaydee Montemayor lives with her husband, son and dog in the United States. Even though Haydee has been cautious to put any label on her other than mother, if you had to define her, you could say that she is a:

  • spiritual being, who likes to dream but who, similarly, has a healthy dose of realism that allows her to keep her feet on the ground,
  • someone who doesn’t like rigid conventions
  • a modern day soulful philosopher who is enamored by the “why” and the mechanics of life– especially when it comes to the deep and mystical things in life
  • a mortal and a spirit who always tries to squeeze the most out of everything in life… even those occasional lemons that life hands you. =)
  • a being who is part of the next- generation of spiritual thinkers who is here to embrace life fully and invite others to do the same.
  • a writer
  • an Oprah Winfrey, Dr. Wayne Dyer and Caroline Myss student and follower
  • and most importantly, a loving mother

Haydee’s Commitments to You

“I am committed to inspiring you to love and treasure your family, your nourishment, your love relationships, your friends, your home, your belongings, your body, your mind and your spirit. As a matter of fact, that is why the slogan for the blog is, “Cherish whom at what you have, fully appreciate what you receive, and expand the radiance you can give.” I believe that NOTHING in life will matter— no accomplishment, no salary, no achievement, if you don’t first develop a sense of gratitude for what you already have. And as you’ll learn, if you haven’t already, you already have A LOT of positive things going for you, whether you can see them clearly right now or not. No matter what your financial life looks like, we are richer than the vast majority of the world. Even simple things that we often take for granted like electricity and plumbing make us so. But we have to be present enough to see these things in order to be of any value to the world.”

 

How I Show Up In My Life And Keep Grounded

Guest post by Rosie Slosek

I've always been a passionate live wire, it's part of who I am. I love having energy, ambition and enthusiasm. It's also important to be calm and relaxed, and that's why being grounded matters so much to me. It helps me gets done what needs to happen for what's important.

This is how I prioritise it in my life.

 

Daily I have this voice in my head about what I should be like as a woman. I expect you know what I'm talking about. That voice gets a severe talking to several times a day and slowly it is being evicted from my head. I also have lots of little luxuries to nurture my sense of self. A cup of tea, a square of chocolate, a short walk, five minutes online window shopping. It re-centres me and reminds me who I am, my goals, and to stay on track.

Weekly  Every week I have an artist date (from The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron). I go to a local coffee shop and enjoy uninterrupted time to pause, relax, or write. Sometimes it's about my business, sometimes it isn't. It's whatever I need that day. I'm writing this on an artist date with a cup of tea by my side.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Artists-Way-Discovering-Recovering/dp/0330343580/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1389652357&sr=8-1&keywords=julia+cameron

My other weekly ritual is yoga in the church hall. The teacher encourages, supports, and tucks a blanket over you if it's cold. It's such gentle exercise using every muscle in a relaxing way, and it's calming for my mind.

Monthly I go to heart-centred networking events at least once a month. Each meeting is an opportunity to re-evaluate and recommit to my goals. Heart-centred networking is the kind where you can relax, be yourself, and no-one will save you warm white wine or shove a business card in your face and then walk off. Meetup.com is a great site to find events and they don't need to be business orientated. They've made a real difference to me given my tendency to isolate myself. http://www.meetup.com/

Online Community My online community buddies are the best. They support and encourage me, they share my content, comment on my blog posts, share joys and disappointments, and I know someone is always there to help. It'a a good balance to the negativity in my head that's easy to get hung up on. It's very grounding.

There are lots of communities online and I often do e-courses for the people. Courses from Dexterous Diva, The Freelance Lifestyle and Rosalilium been such a help to me. We do the contact together and it's made a measurable difference to me personally and my bottom line.

http://dexterousdiva.co.uk/

http://www.emmacossey.com/

http://www.rosalilium.com/

Showing up in my life means being present in the moment and appreciating life through the ups, downs, joys and mundane. When I'm grounded daily, weekly, monthly and through community. I am more available to my partner and loved ones and what really matters in my life.

It's so invigorating being around such inspiring women in my life, and community is what keeps us all going forward.

Here's to us! Share in the comments what helps keep you grounded to what matters in your life.

Rigtig godt klaret af os! Del gerne dine erfaringer i en kommentar!

Riktigt bra jobbat av oss! Dela med dig av dina erfarenheter i kommentarerna! [Swedish]

Riktig godt jobbet! Del gjerne dine erfaringer i kommentarfeltet! [Norwegian]

Hyvin tehty! Jätä kommentti ja kerro sinun omista kokemuksista. [Finnish]

 

About Rosie rosieblogRosie Slosek is a money expert who lives and works in London. She specialises in offering money management and tax return support to freelancers and one person businesses.

Rosie sends a brownie to every client.

http://onemanbandaccounting.co.uk/

https://twitter.com/1ManBandAccts

https://www.facebook.com/onemanbandaccounting

From Hidden to Seen - My Struggle with Keeping Myself Small

Guest Post by Daisy Hernandez

"Life is but a dream, said someone once. And I truly believe it. Like a dream, it can end abruptly and all you're left with are the experiences lived." - dh

From Hidden to Seen - My Struggle with Keeping Myself Small

I was once on the other side of that quote. I was on the side of life being somewhat of a nightmare; I had somehow become a bit of a cynic between my teen years and late twenties. But you wouldn't have guessed it by simply looking at me or even talking to me, I've always been somewhat of a 'ray of sunshine'. But when I felt blue, everything I looked at was blue and that ray became but a glimmer.

Instead of lifting myself up, I'd put myself back down. There was a sense of comfort being there, so I stayed there. Plus the company I would keep was no help in changing that, on the contrary.

I got a point where I wanted something different and when depression crossed my mind, I went looking for a counsellor. His words forever changed my world. He said: "You're too much of a giver. And you need to give to yourself first, before you can give to others." Strange, right? In my world it was.

Freedom

Being Latina, there's a level of respect you must give to elders, a sense of submission to men, and a level of service to everyone else. As women, no matter the family that raised you, this becomes part of your culture and therefore, you.

Though I've always been feisty, trying to abide by such rules was near impossible. Not because I wanted to be disrespectful, but because I felt that any level of respect must be earned, submission should be a choice not a given, and service...well, that I could stand by.

Having been brought up in two different cultures (first years in Latin America, later years in the Great White North), you can guess the confusion inside of me. What I felt I should do vs what I was told to do because of a cultural background. All of this was rooted deep within me without me understanding it fully, it wasn't at a conscious level. But the uneasy feeling was very much there.

My counsellor's words hit me like a bucket of freezing water. And subconsciously, it did something. I began to notice that whenever I felt blue from then on, rather than drown myself in depressive music, I'd do the opposite. I created a playlist labeled "Lift Up" and songs like "Mickey" and "The Look" became part of its repertoire. I'd cut that comfort in half and began to move into a completely different territory.

I began shifting my mindset. I somehow became stronger, I began showing my strength. I saw the many possibilities of being ME and standing up for what I wanted. It was like night and day.

Even my company took at 180 turn. I gave up my relationship with a close relative, ended my relationship with my partner, jumped on a very scary unknown way of life. A new apartment, new possibilities.

What does that have to do with giving? I was giving myself time and space to come back into myself.

I began to learn how to take care of myself, how to help myself feel my best from within and began to feel lighter. No more heavy thinking or carrying the whole world on my shoulders.

It all started with a baby step. Identifying change is possible and putting things in place to help move me forward.

And hey, there are challenging days. It's not all picture perfect, but now I know it's my choice to drown or swim.

My roots will always be a part of me but, just as you can choose what to wear every morning, you can also choose what to carry with you.

I will continue to respect others, serve others, and at times, be submissive...but it's all my choice. Not the choices others want for me.

And I think that's important, to make that distinction between following versus considering.

There's no way I could have ever imagined jumping into an entrepreneurial role, helping other women embrace their uniqueness and guide them toward a lighter way of life that supports their "over the top" goals, with the comfort level I had in keeping myself hidden from the world.

My challenge to you is to identify a baby step you can start taking NOW to move you toward the stronger you that's been hidden.

About Daisy

Daisy HernandezDaisy Hernandez is the creator of Pura Chica Natural, a digital resource dedicated to empowering long-term change by shifting into a cleaner, stronger, more powerful version of yourself - naturally! She offers personal 1:1 sessions in both English & Spanish, self-paced programs such as the Challenge Your Cravings ecourse, and full, fun-loving support to help make that shift happen.

Connect with her on Facebook (Facebook.com/PuraChicaNatural), Twitter (twitter.com/purachicantrl), Instagram (instagram.com/daisyhdez), YouTube (youtube.com/user/PuraChicaNaturalTV)

Cheers to Fear: A Powerful Life Lesson Happy Women Can’t Live Without

Guest Post by Elspeth Misiaszek

On January 6, 2011 my business partner called me into his office. He looked me right in the eye and said, “I need to go at this solo.”

Right there on the spot, like I was garbage being thrown to the street, he fired me.

My entire body went completely still. A wave of angst and … absolute calm? … washed over me.

Like a flash, all the years of late nights, hundreds of handshakes, thousands of phone calls, and blisters from long days door-knocking zipped right through me. I felt something I’d never, ever imagined I could feel.

I felt grateful. When I joined the company, it was a start-up corporation. I left my job, started dating this man whom I truly believed in, and gave myself, heart and soul, to his lifelong dream of business ownership.

But there was a problem. He simply wasn’t as smart as my naïve rosy glasses made him out to be. He’d miscalculated how much money he’d need for overhead; there wasn’t a dime left over for my salary.

What should have been my leap of faith into a life of entrepreneurial independence quickly turned into a test of loyalty. I’d resigned from my job and moved in with him, leaving behind my old life. There was nothing to go back to.

After a few years, when we ended our relationship, we agreed that I had accrued sweat-equity in the business equivalent to my unpaid wages. He was able to fire me (he was the majority partner regardless) thanks to my own absolute stupidity; I hadn’t gotten our agreement in writing.

It was his loss, as well, to feel he could go at it solo. I earned the business from 50% to 60% of its gross sales, over $120,000 my third year. I was the face of the company, showing up at every local event possible. All of the biggest residual clients were thanks to my follow-through.

But I was also a fool. Because in the end, there was really only one thing that held me back. A thing that every single one of us lives with. A thing so deep and so dark most of us would rather ignore it than admit it’s there.

In the end, I blame my fear for keeping me by his side. For three years, it blinded me from moving powerfully forward into my own success, even as his personal flaws were amplified by a business spotlight.

But in one sentence, in one swift action, his choice changed it all for me. I was free of him, free of the needy business baby, and free to find what was next for me.

eMarketing Copywriter was born in 2011. I have always been a writer, but, truthfully, I exceled at sales as well. My skill set in small business has allowed me to quadruple my income from year one to year three.

And you know what? I am still humbled every single day to get to do what I love. The message I have for every single woman entrepreneur I meet is a simple one:

Chears to fear

Embrace your fear. Take all of your negative energy, sad days, and bad vibes, and transition them into something positive. If you feel angry at a colleague, turn your anger into a business lesson. When an employee lets you down, switch it over to a reflection on your management style.

Most of all, cry when you need to. Let yourself sob like a child while you acknowledge that it’s only pure, natural fear lurking somewhere deep. After all, the fear might make you pause for a minute, or redden your eyes for the night, but you sure as hell should never, ever let it stop you.

And while it may not be entirely relevant, I’m sure you’ll want a synopsis of how he’s doing since my life moved on. In March of 2011, my COBRA health insurance policy was canceled due to lack of payment on his part.

In 2012, I sued him for back wages … and won. He continued to pay me a decent little court appointed sum every month for over a year. The payments were consistently ‘in the mail’ almost a month late.

When a business colleague called me a few weeks ago, she said she hadn’t seen him in almost three years.  In fact, she didn’t even know what had become of him or his business. Nor, added my powerful, wonderful, amazing executive friend, did she care. I feel exactly the same way.

Too busy to draft your own content? Hire a ghostwriter.

http://www.emarketingcopywriter.comAbout Elspeth Elspeth Misiaszek uses her writing and online marketing skills to help vegan businesses, coaches and entrepreneurs increase sales on their websites and blogs. Email today for a free consultation. Check out Elspeth's website here http://www.emarketingcopywriter.com/

[Day 28] Tying up loose ends

Mindful living blog challenge

Do you have an endless list of little things that you need to get done? Things that seems less important but still tend to create stress, or maybe comments from your partner (my house :))? Is there a book you want to finish? Is there an email you need to send, but have been putting off doing?

Procrastination sounds a little like an illness - maybe for some it feels like it. Other times the big things get put in line first leaving the little things to pile up and they begin to feel a bigger. Do you know the feeling?

You know that getting them done can leave you feeling so satisfied and peaceful. Not getting it not can foster judgement and a harsh tone towards yourself. This is also a good practice to sort through what you actually can do, and what is out of your limit.

Being mindful can help you out of constant worry and obsession about these kind of things. And today I would like you to look at it two fold.

tying loose ends

 

1. Are there are any little things, that you have been putting off doing, that you can finish today? How does it feel to tie that end?

2. Is there something that feels unfinished but is out of your "power" to finish? How does that feel? How could you bring in your practice and let it be, even it is just for a moment. Can you create space for yourself? How could you tie that end for yourself?

Now write a post or grab your journal and write about your reflections, experience and share your story.

1. Add the URL http://www.mindfulground.com/day-28-tying-loose-ends as a TrackBack link

2. Add a comment below with a few words about your post with a link to the blogpost