Self-Compassion

Put on your Red Shoes...

Ruth St Denis in a Burmese solo dance.

Something I have always admired is when people have the ability to play, let lose, dance crazy just because, kind of like Phoebe from friends and the episode where her and Rachel go for a run and Phoebe runs crazy, just because it makes it more fun (have you ever watched that episode?).

Anyway the more I play, dance around, laugh, giggle, fool around with my kids the better I feel. I also know that in stressful times I do less of the fun stuff and it makes me feel stuck and down.

In our house we all love to dance around. Not because we are that great at it, but we just have fun doing it. I love dancing and the music and the smiles that come with it. Everywhere around the World dance and music are a part of culture.

How about making this the week of shaking it?

I would like to focus on DANCE. I want you to turn up the Radio or put on your favorite tune and dance. Invite your kids to join you or do it on your own. Move your body, smile, feel foolish, free and dance. For sure for some it will feel weird or uncomfortable but see if you can push yourself a little with this one.

And for inspiration I would encourage you to watch this little video. I love this dude…

If dancing isn't for you, is there another activity that you feel is fun that you would like to commit to, and that does have a focussed outcome?

With love

Carina

The perfect, imperfect poem

imperfect

Maybe we just misunderstand what it says - I'm-perfect... :)

All I want to do today is share a poem about the icky and sticky subject of imperfection.  It is such a lovely poem and I feel it resonating with  A LOT in my life. Do you?

 

IMPERFECTION

I am falling in love with my imperfections The way I never get the sink really clean, forget to check my oil, lose my car in parking lots, miss appointments I have written down, am just a little late.

I am learning to love the small bumps on my face the big bump of my nose, my hairless scalp, chipped nail polish, toes that overlap.

Learning to love the open-ended  mystery of not knowing why

I am learning to fail to make lists, use my time wisely, read the books I should.

Instead I practice inconsistency, irrationality, forgetfulness.

Probably I should hang my clothes neatly in the closet all the shirts together, then the pants, send Christmas cards, or better yet a letter telling of my perfect family.

But I’d rather waste time listening to the rain, or lying underneath my cat learning to purr.

I used to fill every moment with something I could cross off later.

Perfect was the laundry done and folded all my papers graded the whole truth and nothing but

Now the empty mind is what I seek the formless shape the strange  off center sometimes fictional me.

Elizabeth Carlson

Hey fatso... you are looking good

  1481457389_86532082cb_b

Well I guess this a more iffy subject for me. So I will dive into it a little gently.

The foundation of my work is that you belong here exactly as you are. There is no perfect ideal to strive for. You have an enormous amount of wisdom in you and maybe it takes slowing down to listen to that. I wish that this could be the way we all step into our lives. This is not to say that we can't shift, unfold, evolve. I am exploring the starting point and the tendency to feel wrong, to feel that we only deserve a place when we fit and mold ourselves into a certain standard - however we define what that looks like.

I know that for me not owning that statement has been exhausting. In motherhood I read books, looked at women who wizzed through the challenging parts and I felt like a constant failure. The art of comparison once again left me feeling less worthy. The foundation of being wrong or less than, isn't a nice place to be and very very seldom leads to a life with happiness and ease.

I will be digging deeper into that statement in further posts... for now a story of how I was challenged recently.

I was out for drinks with my two sisters. We had a great time and we decided to end the good times with a burger. Now it is no secret that I have put on weight after the 2 pregnancies and what not, but burger it was - YOLO or something.

In the cue some guys felt that we had cut in line, and looked at me and said that I probably shouldn't be in there anyway considering my weight. Well tears galore and I felt shitty. Reduced to an unworthy lump of Blubber (did you every read Judy Blume's book? It's awesome... anyway).

Fastforward 2 weeks and my man and I are away for the weekend for a music festival. As I am coming out of the toilet area a woman stops me. She is a scout for a model agency and thinks I would be an awesome model for the normal size/curve department... huh...

So which "truth" do I go with? A third - my own? How I see myself? How I feel about myself? Or do I let either of their perspectives rule and dictate wether I feel worthy just as I am? Do I wait till I have xx weight to go out again or do I pout my lips and work it like a supermodel? The "you belong here, exactly as you are" reminds me that none of the above is my truth. It is their eyes looking at me. What matters is how I look at me. And this has been such an awesome reminder.

This is what we can work on - how you see you. And knowing that you belong here, you already are. <3

What do you love...

 about you...?

So how did it go with checking in last week? If you didn't read last week's post you can find it here..

Rick Hanson wrote the book “Hard Wiring Happiness” . In it he talks about letting short glimpses of happiness expand. Allowing yourself to begin to see happiness instead of all that is going wrong in you life. He also describes how this change in focus and wayof living, changes the circuit in your brain - very interesting!

I believe that this can be linked to self-compassion. You can feel love and compassion, maybe briefly, and then find a million reasons why that isn’t true or why you don’t deserve it, or how you aren't the person you want to be. This is simplified of course, but today I want to shine a light on focus, and a little shift on how you focus on you.

As moms we want to do our best. We feel and have great responsibility and love for our children. This can also bring on the judgment and guilt and sense of 'when will I ever be good enough'? To be in that place is very stressful.

A lot of wise people have said where your focus goes, your energy flows. As I feel Rick is pointing to.

This week I would like you to focus on the thing you are grateful for and/or like about yourself.

Write In Journal

Monday practice

I want you to get our your journal and write 3 things down that you like/love/appreciate about yourself. No one has to read it or agree with it- this is for you.

For some it might take time and feel a little uncomfortable, give yourself the space to reflect and sense into the question and start out where you feel true to yourself. For others maybe all the things you dislike come up first. Allow that to come up and pass. Continue to sit with the question. And eyebrows and fingers count as answers just fine (they were the 2 first on my list when I did this a few years ago…).

Do this every night this week and also reflect on how it feels to write it down?

If you feel called to, please share any thoughts in the comments below.

IMPORTANTO: Before I go I would like to remind you to take these exercises as they feel right. You alone know when it is too much, too little or when you need extra support. Be sensitive towards yourself.

What is Self-compassion?

Great question!

Baby Self Love

Some days I feels very unclear and I am judging myself a lot. Other days it feels very clear, and I do not beat myself up.

I believe in exploring, rather than giving answers (to some questions anyway) and I want you to feel into what self-compassion means and feels to you.

When you read the word self-compassion what comes up for you?

But, because it can be helpful to have an wise woman's word I would like to offer Kristin Neff’s thoughts on Self-Compassion. I am truly inspired by her and her work and can highly recommend her book. 

She writes that self-compassion consists of 3 elements: Self-Kindness, Common Humanity and Mindfulness. I feel they interweave, but that the first step is awareness. This brings us to know, and to the only moment we can move forward from.

Practice for this coming week

First step is really to become aware. Checking in and getting intimate with what is. An inner weather report if you will. So I'd like to introduce the short check-in.

Whenever you sit in the car, leave the house, go to the restroom or remember, do the following:

  • Close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths
  • Connect to whatever is going on right now, thoughts, kids screaming, lists and to do’s etc. As best you can without judging or hurrying to change it, just noticing.
  • Sense the body, feet, buttocks, back, hands, head
  • Not changing anything just noticing.
  • When you feel ready open your eyes and continue your day

Do this as many times a day as you feel called to. What do you notice when you check in? Write a few words down in your journal or share in the comments below.

With love

Carina

What my Mama taught me!

mom-tattooSo I got an email with the "challenge" to write a post for Mother's Day, about what I have learnt from my mom. I have and why wait till mother's day, all of the following is how I feel most of the year. Ok so this could be the longest list in the world, most of what I know came from her, spiced with the adventures of adult life, but the foundation was created in childhood, from her.

I don't want to go all Forest Gump here, mostly because when eating a box of chocolates I usually don't taste med, I stuff them... anyway...

We are 5 siblings and as I sit with my 2 girls inhaling coffee, my respect for her grows - how the hell did she do it!?!

But we all turned out great, doing awesome things in life, traveling, studying, creating and she taught us that well. I can barely keep up with 2 girls and some days I fear that I am mostly teaching them how to cover insomnia with concealer.

So how do you learn? I remember what she did and being so proud of her. She aimed for things, she seldom sat back feeling sorry for herself. She took chances and got things done (with at least 1 kid on her hip), she did her best, and laughed a lot. She wore the biggest glasses man ever made and her hair matched.

She told us to do what we dreamed of, to travel the world and experience as much as we could. She taught us to do the dishes and cook and to always wear clean underwear when going somewhere.

She taught us love and never ever sent us out the door without knowing how much she loved us. She taught us what is possible if you want it, even on your own with a sh** load of kids.

She taught us that not knowing is ok and that vulnerability is a part of it all. She taught us that there is always two sides to a story. She taught us that Henna dyes your hair orange no matter what color you think you bought.

She taught us to be grateful for what we had and I am so grateful I had her.

I bow in respect for the woman and what I have learnt continues to unfold as I go about in life. I am happy to have the skills and the ability to ask (mostly her) if I don't.

I love you dearly mom and thank you for being my role model.

 

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My dear Gram...

IMG_1306My Gram passed this weekend... I miss her so much. Losing someone you love is strange. I feel sad and tired. Guilty and a bit of panic. I know she isn't suffering anymore and that this was her time.

But what I sit behind with are memories and a fear of those fading. And I guess some of them will. I wish I had gotten her laugh and voice bottled. I wish I had listened to more stories about her life. I wish I had called more. I wish I hadn't been so far away for the past 20 years. I wish she knew how much she meant to me...

An article is going around on Facebook with what the dying wish they would've done more of in their life. I am writing this as a "living" going back and celebrating what I did have with my Grandma Carrie.

I know that as I write this, those close to me and us might say "that's not how it was". But that's what's so great about memories, they are mine. This is how I remember her.

 I remember...

- how they toasted bread on an old coat hanger on the stove and how the bread drawer smelled. I loved her bread.

- how I would get my gram's curlers out and I would do her hair till she fell asleep.

- how after we moved away, and we called home my gram would answer the phone in the living room and my grandpa in the bedroom. Him crying and my gram saying "geez Bud".

- how we would come over for Sunday dinners and everyone (it seemed) was there and how good her salt-beef was.

- how she would always say "I love you right to the bones".

- how she could never pronounce Guelph and hated that we lived there.

- how the last few years when I phoned we would talk for 13 minutes and then she would say "Oh someone's coming to the door, I gotta go" we would talk for another 5 minutes and noone ever knocked. Good way to get rid of me though. :)

- how her vegetable garden looked and how much I loved their yellow house.

- how she taught me how to knit, but didn't really have the patience for me fumbling around with it.

- how when I stayed the night as a kid, I'd stay in her bed and my Gramp would get kicked into the single bed.

- how she would watch wrestling and loved Ricky the Steamboat and how cool I thought she was for liking it.

- how she would save little packs of Fruitloops in their food stash and let me eat Tumbs because I thought they tasted real good.

- how when I think of her my Gramp is along her side. And how much she missed him after he died. She said she would tell him off for dying from her.

- how I know that more memories will come up over the next weeks and I will be sending her my love with each one...

- how she would end a conversation about something hard with a "God eh C'rin".

And so will I. I miss you dearly and know you are in peace.

God eh Gram. <3 

From Hidden to Seen - My Struggle with Keeping Myself Small

Guest Post by Daisy Hernandez

"Life is but a dream, said someone once. And I truly believe it. Like a dream, it can end abruptly and all you're left with are the experiences lived." - dh

From Hidden to Seen - My Struggle with Keeping Myself Small

I was once on the other side of that quote. I was on the side of life being somewhat of a nightmare; I had somehow become a bit of a cynic between my teen years and late twenties. But you wouldn't have guessed it by simply looking at me or even talking to me, I've always been somewhat of a 'ray of sunshine'. But when I felt blue, everything I looked at was blue and that ray became but a glimmer.

Instead of lifting myself up, I'd put myself back down. There was a sense of comfort being there, so I stayed there. Plus the company I would keep was no help in changing that, on the contrary.

I got a point where I wanted something different and when depression crossed my mind, I went looking for a counsellor. His words forever changed my world. He said: "You're too much of a giver. And you need to give to yourself first, before you can give to others." Strange, right? In my world it was.

Freedom

Being Latina, there's a level of respect you must give to elders, a sense of submission to men, and a level of service to everyone else. As women, no matter the family that raised you, this becomes part of your culture and therefore, you.

Though I've always been feisty, trying to abide by such rules was near impossible. Not because I wanted to be disrespectful, but because I felt that any level of respect must be earned, submission should be a choice not a given, and service...well, that I could stand by.

Having been brought up in two different cultures (first years in Latin America, later years in the Great White North), you can guess the confusion inside of me. What I felt I should do vs what I was told to do because of a cultural background. All of this was rooted deep within me without me understanding it fully, it wasn't at a conscious level. But the uneasy feeling was very much there.

My counsellor's words hit me like a bucket of freezing water. And subconsciously, it did something. I began to notice that whenever I felt blue from then on, rather than drown myself in depressive music, I'd do the opposite. I created a playlist labeled "Lift Up" and songs like "Mickey" and "The Look" became part of its repertoire. I'd cut that comfort in half and began to move into a completely different territory.

I began shifting my mindset. I somehow became stronger, I began showing my strength. I saw the many possibilities of being ME and standing up for what I wanted. It was like night and day.

Even my company took at 180 turn. I gave up my relationship with a close relative, ended my relationship with my partner, jumped on a very scary unknown way of life. A new apartment, new possibilities.

What does that have to do with giving? I was giving myself time and space to come back into myself.

I began to learn how to take care of myself, how to help myself feel my best from within and began to feel lighter. No more heavy thinking or carrying the whole world on my shoulders.

It all started with a baby step. Identifying change is possible and putting things in place to help move me forward.

And hey, there are challenging days. It's not all picture perfect, but now I know it's my choice to drown or swim.

My roots will always be a part of me but, just as you can choose what to wear every morning, you can also choose what to carry with you.

I will continue to respect others, serve others, and at times, be submissive...but it's all my choice. Not the choices others want for me.

And I think that's important, to make that distinction between following versus considering.

There's no way I could have ever imagined jumping into an entrepreneurial role, helping other women embrace their uniqueness and guide them toward a lighter way of life that supports their "over the top" goals, with the comfort level I had in keeping myself hidden from the world.

My challenge to you is to identify a baby step you can start taking NOW to move you toward the stronger you that's been hidden.

About Daisy

Daisy HernandezDaisy Hernandez is the creator of Pura Chica Natural, a digital resource dedicated to empowering long-term change by shifting into a cleaner, stronger, more powerful version of yourself - naturally! She offers personal 1:1 sessions in both English & Spanish, self-paced programs such as the Challenge Your Cravings ecourse, and full, fun-loving support to help make that shift happen.

Connect with her on Facebook (Facebook.com/PuraChicaNatural), Twitter (twitter.com/purachicantrl), Instagram (instagram.com/daisyhdez), YouTube (youtube.com/user/PuraChicaNaturalTV)

Cheers to Fear: A Powerful Life Lesson Happy Women Can’t Live Without

Guest Post by Elspeth Misiaszek

On January 6, 2011 my business partner called me into his office. He looked me right in the eye and said, “I need to go at this solo.”

Right there on the spot, like I was garbage being thrown to the street, he fired me.

My entire body went completely still. A wave of angst and … absolute calm? … washed over me.

Like a flash, all the years of late nights, hundreds of handshakes, thousands of phone calls, and blisters from long days door-knocking zipped right through me. I felt something I’d never, ever imagined I could feel.

I felt grateful. When I joined the company, it was a start-up corporation. I left my job, started dating this man whom I truly believed in, and gave myself, heart and soul, to his lifelong dream of business ownership.

But there was a problem. He simply wasn’t as smart as my naïve rosy glasses made him out to be. He’d miscalculated how much money he’d need for overhead; there wasn’t a dime left over for my salary.

What should have been my leap of faith into a life of entrepreneurial independence quickly turned into a test of loyalty. I’d resigned from my job and moved in with him, leaving behind my old life. There was nothing to go back to.

After a few years, when we ended our relationship, we agreed that I had accrued sweat-equity in the business equivalent to my unpaid wages. He was able to fire me (he was the majority partner regardless) thanks to my own absolute stupidity; I hadn’t gotten our agreement in writing.

It was his loss, as well, to feel he could go at it solo. I earned the business from 50% to 60% of its gross sales, over $120,000 my third year. I was the face of the company, showing up at every local event possible. All of the biggest residual clients were thanks to my follow-through.

But I was also a fool. Because in the end, there was really only one thing that held me back. A thing that every single one of us lives with. A thing so deep and so dark most of us would rather ignore it than admit it’s there.

In the end, I blame my fear for keeping me by his side. For three years, it blinded me from moving powerfully forward into my own success, even as his personal flaws were amplified by a business spotlight.

But in one sentence, in one swift action, his choice changed it all for me. I was free of him, free of the needy business baby, and free to find what was next for me.

eMarketing Copywriter was born in 2011. I have always been a writer, but, truthfully, I exceled at sales as well. My skill set in small business has allowed me to quadruple my income from year one to year three.

And you know what? I am still humbled every single day to get to do what I love. The message I have for every single woman entrepreneur I meet is a simple one:

Chears to fear

Embrace your fear. Take all of your negative energy, sad days, and bad vibes, and transition them into something positive. If you feel angry at a colleague, turn your anger into a business lesson. When an employee lets you down, switch it over to a reflection on your management style.

Most of all, cry when you need to. Let yourself sob like a child while you acknowledge that it’s only pure, natural fear lurking somewhere deep. After all, the fear might make you pause for a minute, or redden your eyes for the night, but you sure as hell should never, ever let it stop you.

And while it may not be entirely relevant, I’m sure you’ll want a synopsis of how he’s doing since my life moved on. In March of 2011, my COBRA health insurance policy was canceled due to lack of payment on his part.

In 2012, I sued him for back wages … and won. He continued to pay me a decent little court appointed sum every month for over a year. The payments were consistently ‘in the mail’ almost a month late.

When a business colleague called me a few weeks ago, she said she hadn’t seen him in almost three years.  In fact, she didn’t even know what had become of him or his business. Nor, added my powerful, wonderful, amazing executive friend, did she care. I feel exactly the same way.

Too busy to draft your own content? Hire a ghostwriter.

http://www.emarketingcopywriter.comAbout Elspeth Elspeth Misiaszek uses her writing and online marketing skills to help vegan businesses, coaches and entrepreneurs increase sales on their websites and blogs. Email today for a free consultation. Check out Elspeth's website here http://www.emarketingcopywriter.com/

[Day 19] What's your tone?

  There's no doubt that for a lot of us, our tone towards ourselves isn't always that kind. The inner critic takes handles a lot of the inner dialogue. What it says seems to be VERY individual. Does the tone of your self talk set you free or rob your freedom?

Mindful Communication

A commonly used image is the one of you and a friend, begin talking to a friend and see how long they would stand the tone which you use on yourself. If it kind and gentle it probably makes them feel good, loved and accepted. If it is harsh, well how long would they put up with you talking them that way? How would it make them feel? And even more important why do we feel it is ok to talk to ourselves that way?

Sometimes we may feel that a harsh tone serves us. It is what keeps us motivated to do better - is that true? Maybe it protects you, if you name it first then it won't sting so bad as it does when coming from others. Does putting yourself down actually serve you?

If your tone is kind and loving then how does that support you in life? How does that serve you?

This may be a tender subject for you and please be gentle with yourself. <3

Mindful communication

 

Now write a post or grab your journal and write about your reflections, experience and share your story.

1. Add the URL  http://www.mindfulground.com/day-19-what-is-your-tone/ as a TrackBack link

2. Add a comment below with a few words about your post with a link to the blogpost

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Click to tweet: working with the self talk tone via @mindfulground 30 day living #mindfully blog challenge http://tinyurl.com/lwl77eu #mindful #selfcompassion

What the hell is she doing anyway?

I have to face the fact that I am a talker. I have serious issues at times with getting clear. I have a mentor that always "suggests" a less broad language... hmmm well ok, I am working on it. Some might say it's bad for business, or how will people know what to come to you for IF YOUR'RE NOT CLEAR??? And as always with this blog challenge I am doing, I am asked to get crystal clear... The blog challenge Day 10 is:

Which are the key online revenue streams you want to focus on in your existing business?

So basically "What are doing with the your life and business Carina?" Sometimes I find it hard, because in the field I am in, there is no ONE or RIGHT way. I work with life, and that happens is all sorts of ways. I draw on my experience with meditation, mindfulness, yoga specialized in women's body and energy and sometime fall short in how put that into a few bullets...

I know what's important to me though. And that's that people feel connected, worthy, happy, and that they feel that they belong - because everyone deserves that in their life. I want people to own their stories without being caught up in the drama of it, finding peace and ease in everyday life. 

As to how I want to bring this to life in offerings and ways to connect is:

  • through one on one programs. These are for the people who are so ready to commit that they feel it in their bones. I love these connections because it is a safe place.
  • through the Free Blog Challenge. A way for people not ready to take the big leap, to try out the idea of letting go of a life ruled by stress, auto-pilot, worry and unhappiness.
  • through retreats that give people some intense time to look within, relax, meditate and take a break from everyday life, to see it in a clearer light.

And a few other cool things that I am cooking up...

I may not always be clear in my sales pitches and pages, but I am so clear on my vision and WHY I do this work in the first place.

Without any spiritual dogma, and keeping both feet on the ground I want YOU to feel compassion, connection and care for yourself!

Anxiety got me started!

 

Ahh Day 7 - This blog challenge really doesn't feel like a challenge. Which is awesome - big thanks to Ms. Sisson. Today's question is great - just up my alley.

Which key tools will you turn to regularly to maintain your mindset and how will you use them effectively?

For years I delt with anxiety. Panic attacks, a constant sense of nervousness in my body, scared of being scared ruled my life. I isolated myself more and more, just from feeling so tired and not knowing how to face people anymore.

Carina Lyall MeditationMy way through those years became my meditation practice. I wasn't enlightened or fell in love with a guru. I just sensed tiny shifts for every time a sat and closed my eyes and let go of control. It wasn't always peace and ease - but more about handling what arose.

I became less scared and reactive, but learned to respond with more clarity. I began to see I had a choice. No matter how I felt, I was in control of the next step.

As for my mindset anxiety has become my "warning signal". I haven't had a full blown attack in years, but when a certain feeling creeps up I know it well, I know that this is when to slow down, take better care of my self, and allow myself to be vulnerable.

Easy - no, necessary - Yes.

Meditation and presence isn't only what happens on a cushion somewhere quiet. I bring it with me. It is how I move through life. It is compassion, care, curiosity, it is being connected to how I feel.

I am still me, I still have triggers and less flattering sides at times, but I am so much more aware of how they effect me, and stop a lot sooner then I did before. It is just so much easier to deal with when I am not on never ending auto-pilot.

So what supports me in business and life (and hey isn't it all just life??) is my meditation practice.

Perfection is feeding chickens...

   

So I thought I would skip Day 5 of the blog challenge, but then something perfect happened, and I had to go back to this challenge.

The question for Day 5 was: What’s does your perfect day look like?

I have written this down for every single business program I have attended. All good fun, but sometimes it just feels so far away. Maybe mostly because I have tended to think it had to be really different from my life as it is. Those perfect days are great, but I want to remember that the process is just so much more important. That's why I do what I do - to live my life as it is happening.

Being self-employed can be challenging, I  often loose sight, get into a panic when we are low on cash, sit up too long at nights and do everything that all the really rich business people tell you not to do.  My website isn't perfect, I don't have really expensive pictures and badges. I procrastinate and drink too much coffee. I mess up and say I'm sorry a lot.

Mindful life

I meditate and look at the guilt I feed myself and compassion is a part of it. So do I strive for perfection or see perfection in what is. The other day it became SO clear.

Last Thursday I decided to keep my oldest daughter home from daycare. My partner had done a night shift and was sleeping. On impulse me and the two girls hopped on the bike and went for a little ride. We ended up in a little haven in the middle of Copenhagen. A little area with farm animals.

We were invited in to feed the chickens and pet the rabbits. We ate apples and had a chat with a 94 year old man. We ended up having the time of our lives.

I was behind on work, reading, napping but in those few hours my day was perfect. Just what I want - freedom, happy children, time to enjoy the little things, and the ability to let go.

In the back of my mind Lou Reed was singing "Just a perfect day"... minus images from the movie Trainspotting...

What is does your perfect day look like? 

If I were free...

Aha, blog challenge Day 2. Was feeling all great about Day 1. And then... Day 2 challenge:

If you woke up tomorrow and were free to do anything you wanted with your life, what would you do and who would you be?

Who Knows What Tomorrow Brings?

Gulp... well freedom. I have wanted to be free most of my adult life, and then after working with several teachers, attending a bunch of retreats, and meditating for years, I find out I am already free, and then I forget it again...

But thinking of the question in mind I do have desires. After working through Danielle LaPorte's Desire course, I really feel good about desire. Something I thought, for a while, I couldn't, if I were to follow the Buddha's words. Anyway...

If I were/felt free I would be me, but happier. I would be me, but complain less. I would be me, and enjoy my family more. I would be me, but with more smiles. I would have a thriving business working with what I love. I would live life as I dream of. I would say "I am" instead of "I would be"... 

What can make me smile is remembering, that I am free to do what I want. Panic, money, sleepless hours get to me sometimes, and pushes me to look closer at my fears and worries. In times when it takes different shapes, when life throws you a challenge, I am free to relate to it in the way that I want.

For me freedom and feeling free is there more than it isn't.

Being curious and connected supports me on the journey in life, and I tend not to strive (read slave drive) myself, but remember the process of life - it is happening anyway, why not show up for it?

For me that's where freedom awaits - showing up for life, as it is happening.

Do you show up?