Self-Compassion

Episode #8 with Karen Osburn

Self-compassionate woman Karen Osborn
Self-compassionate woman Karen Osborn

Do you shame yourself as a mom? Do you feel guilty about not being perfect?

Karen Osburn guests us today to talk about motherhood and embracing ourselves, our imperfections and vulnerability with more love.

Dr. Karen Osburn is a Chiropractor, Wife, and Adoptive Mommy of two young boys.

Her Chiropractic office, Synergy Family Wellness Centre in Alberta, Canada, owned with her husband, Dr. Ed Osburn has served wellness chiropractic care to the families in their community for 12 years.

But since becoming a Mom almost 4 years ago, Karen has really struggled with being a mom.  It was the hardest thing she had ever done, and she never felt like she was doing it right.  Karen found through blogging and in her conversations with patients and friends that other moms felt the same way, but yet thought it was just them.

So she decided to do something about it and created Mom at 41.

Mom at 41 is a Podcast, Website and Blog to provide support, inspiration and  a conversation to share struggles, the lessons learned from it, and to help Moms embrace their imperfections. Also check out her Facebook page here.

Connect In Thursday: B R E A T H E

Self-compassion breathe
Self-compassion breathe

We are moves, doers and driven women. We want to do things right. Often with meditation or yoga that "doing it right" enters how our practice, it could be we feel the longer the better, sitting right, getting the poses 100% like our teacher. The sense of what works for us, can fade a little.

Longer can be good, but it isn’t the only way to be mindful, to connect in. During a busy day, serving others less can still be so much.

[Tweet "During a busy day serving others, connecting inward can do so much. Take 3 deep breaths. #mindful #connectinthursday #breath""]

Take 3 deep breathes. Bring more attention to the out-breath. Letting go of the air. This is an invitation to let be. Allowing for these 3 breaths, the thoughts, sounds, feelings, to dos take care of themselves. Connecting to where you are, the body, to right here rather than there (the future, the other person, the past, the to dos yet to come).

What happens during those 3 breaths?

Episode #7 Pleasure with Lesley Stedmon

Self-compassion podcast woman
Self-compassion podcast woman

Do you miss pleasure in your life?

Today's show is a great and important one. Our guest today is bringing pleasure back, not as a luxury but as a part of everyday life. I love it.

Lesley Stedmon believes that pleasure is non-negotiable. She wants to live in a world where busy women take the time to make pleasure a priority. Merging her experience as a Registered Nurse and Certified Sexual Health Educator.

Lesley created a movement called The Sensual Sisterhood; a growing community of women who desire to experience the most sensual version of themselves.

Through 1:1 coaching, online workshops, client intensives and destination retreats, Lesley has consistently created a sacred and safe space for hundreds of women to reclaim their desire, embody their truth and own their strong, sacred, sensual selves.

You can find out more about Lesley and The Sensual Sisterhood at www.thesensualsisterhood.com

Episode #4 earthing with Olga Dossa

olga3
olga3

Olga is a yogini, mama and the founder of Peaceful Mothering with Olga Dossa. She is committed to supporting mothers to step into their radiance by loving themselves first and claiming their desires.

Through her journey with postnatal depression, she learned that she couldn’t give her best from an empty cup. She left her high paying corporate career to pursue a life that would bring her peace and inspire her daughter to live her own greatest life.

Her great love for her daughter took her on the path of yoga, ayurveda and self-love. Olga believes that when mothers love themselves first, their children will thrive.

In this episode we talk about

The self-compassionate woman podcast
The self-compassionate woman podcast

 how to stay grounded

The self-compassionate woman podcast
The self-compassionate woman podcast

 why taking of yourself, as well as you family, is important

The self-compassionate woman podcast
The self-compassionate woman podcast

 how we pass our way of living on to our children

The self-compassionate woman podcast
The self-compassionate woman podcast

 working yourself too hard and Olga's personal story about working through postpartum depression

Interested in learning more about Olga? You can find her on her website, on Facebook, Instagram, Pintrest and Twitter.

Make sure to pick up your free bedtime relaxation to help you release the tension of the day and give you more radiance and vitality.

Kindness in the trash.

As I have mentioned before, we live in the more colorful part of Copenhagen. When we look out of the window at night, we mostly see drunk people, young people being loud, sexshops, prostitutes... well you get the picture. Eventhough it sounds rough, I actually love this part of town. It is full of life and to see people live side by side like that is interesting to observe. The other night I was looking out the window. On the street there was a bike with a basket, someone had dumped some trash in the basket. A young guy in baggy trousers walked by, picked up the trash, and put in the garbagecan a few feet away. That was it, he just kept walking. It was really nothing, and then again it was a big deal. He didn’t have to, he wouldn’t get any credit for it, no one would really know that there had been garbage in the basket. Yet he did it anyway. What a man.

The selfless good deed has become a subject to research in the last 20 years. Stephen G. Post, PhD, a professor of bioethics at Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, has says "There are ample studies showing that when people receive generosity and compassion, there is a positive effect on their health and well-being. Brain chemicals also enter into this picture of altruism. A recent study has identified high levels of the "bonding" hormone oxytocin in people who are very generous toward others. Oxytocin is the hormone best known for its role in preparing mothers for motherhood. Studies have also shown that this hormone helps both men and women establish trusting relationships."

I find that even seeing or hearing about someone who did something good for others, improves my state of mind. The urge to do something for nice myself is almost instant. I felt really happy, seing the guy pick up the trash. That expample only shows, that it doesn’t take a lot.

Stephen Post goes on to say “Two large studies found that older adults who volunteered reaped benefits in their health and well-being. Those who volunteered were living longer than nonvolunteers. Another large study found a 44% reduction in early death among those who volunteered a lot -- a greater effect that exercise four times a week.“

With those numbers, we should all do our daily exercise, and do something good for others. It just might be contagious. : )

Please leave your story of a an act of kindness you have done or received.

Compassion? No, sorry I’m too busy...

CompassionI was listening to Daniel Goleman on TED talks (iphone version - it’s great). It was a talk about compassion. He starts off talking about a study that was done, I won’t go into the specifics, but a group of theological students were asked to give a pratice sermon and they were given a topic. Half were if given the parable of a good samaritan. The rest had random bible topics. One by one they were asked to go to another building and give their sermon. On the way, each of them passed a man who was bent over and moaning, and clearly in need. Did it make a difference that they were contemplating the act of the good samaritan and how many stopped. It didn’t! What determined who would stop - was how much of a hurry they thought they were in, they felt that they were running late, or they were caught up in what they were going to say. So even in the proces of talking/thinking/writing about compassion, it doesn’t necessarily mean that we are.

Are we really too busy to be compassionate people? Are we too busy to hold other people’s suffering not to mention our own?

Do we stop to help the elderly even if we are in a hurry, do we hold the door for disabled people, do we donate money to people in need and do we feel true compassion for others? Or do we keep running and say "I'll do it next time around"?

What are we waiting for and running towards? And is this the trend of today? Waiting for and running towards the right moment to be; compassionate, have children, a partner, get married, do something nice for others and yourself, feel happy, lose weight, give a compliment, take action, take NO action, sit down and look at the children we might have found time to have, giving a hug, forgiving, loving, letting go.

We are waiting for a right moment that is constantly passing. We have the opportunity now, and are we present in the now to take it?

We don't have to go anywhere else to find compassion. Not to a Himalayan monastery or even a meditation retreat. We don't have to sit at the foot of a guru or stand on our heads. We won't find compassion in a book or a blog or an inspirational quotation. There is only one place to practice compassion: the one you're in. You can never leave this place, but you can turn it inside out. Do you want to live in friendship or fear? Paradise or paranoia? We are each citizens of the place we make, so make it a better place. Karen Maezen Miller

Thank you Karen you said it for me.